ארבע שעות ביום

אוריין צ’פלין
רבות כבר דובר בחינוך המשותף בקיבוצים, אבל כמעט ולא דובר על האימהוֹת במודל הייחודי הזה. כל תפקידי האימהוּת המסורתיים נמסרו לידיים אחרות: רחצה, הלבשה, האכלה, השכבה לישון והשכמה בבוקר, טיפול בילד חולה. את הכול עשתה המטפלת בבית הילדים, שבידיה הופקדה למעשה הסמכות האימהית.
מה מרגישה אמא שפוגשת את ילדיה לזמן קצוב, ארבע שעות ביום? כיצד חוו האימהות הללו את המציאות של הפרידה והניתוק? כיצד הושפע הקשר שלהן עם ילדיהן?
בשלושה-עשר מונולוגים מרתקים ומרגשים, המבוססים על שיחות שקיימה אוריין צ’פלין עם נשים בנות דורות שונים מכל התנועות הקיבוציות, נפרשים חייהן כאימהות בקיבוץ.
לספר מצורפת אחרית דבר מאת פרופ’ אריאלה פרידמן, מחברת הספר מחוברות – אימהות ובנות.
שם: ארבע שעות ביום
מחבר/ת: אוריין צ’פלין
שפה: עברית
תחום: הורות ומשפחה
תת תחום: הורות ומשפחה
מק״ט: 011194616
קרא עוד
המחיר הקטלוגי של הפריט: 72.00
קרא פרק ראשון
				   
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         <h3>מבוא</h3>
         
         <p dir="rtl" style="text-indent:0;"><span class="regular"> </span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl" style="text-indent:0;"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">"</span><span class="regular">מה</span> <span class="regular">הכי</span> <span class="regular">חשוב</span> <span class="regular">לך</span> <span class="regular">שאדע</span> <span class="regular">לפני</span> <span class="regular">שאתחיל</span> <span class="regular">לתכנן</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">הבית</span><span class="regular">?"</span> <span class="regular">שאל</span> <span class="regular">אותי</span> <span class="regular">האדריכל</span> <span class="regular">ששכרנו</span> <span class="regular">לבניית</span> <span class="regular">ביתנו</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">עניתי</span> <span class="regular">בלי</span> <span class="regular">לחשוב</span> <span class="regular">פעמיים</span><span class="regular">: "</span><span class="regular">אני</span> <span class="regular">מבקשת</span> <span class="regular">שחדרי</span> <span class="regular">הילדים</span> <span class="regular">יהיו</span> <span class="regular">צמודים</span> <span class="regular">לשלי</span><span class="regular">".</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">"</span><span class="regular">הפתעת</span> <span class="regular">אותי</span><span class="regular">",</span> <span class="regular">אמר</span> <span class="regular">האדריכל</span><span class="regular">, "</span><span class="regular">אני</span> <span class="regular">רגיל</span> <span class="regular">לבקשה</span> <span class="regular">ההפוכה</span><span class="regular">".</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">הבנתי</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">"</span><span class="regular">הבקשה</span> <span class="regular">הנפוצה</span> <span class="regular">ביותר</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">זוגות</span> <span class="regular">צעירים</span> <span class="regular">בראשית</span> <span class="regular">תכנון</span> <span class="regular">הבית</span> <span class="regular">היא</span> <span class="regular">להפריד</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">חדרי</span> <span class="regular">הילדים</span> <span class="regular">מחדר</span> <span class="regular">ההורים</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">הצורך</span> <span class="regular">בפרטיות</span> <span class="regular">זוגית</span> <span class="regular">עולה</span> <span class="regular">בדרך</span> <span class="regular">כלל</span> <span class="regular">כבר</span> <span class="regular">בפגישה</span> <span class="regular">הראשונה</span><span class="regular">",</span> <span class="regular">הסביר</span> <span class="regular">במשיכת</span> <span class="regular">כתפיים</span> <span class="regular">וציין</span> <span class="regular">בניירותיו</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">בקשתי</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">בתום</span> <span class="regular">הפגישה</span> <span class="regular">הרהרתי</span> <span class="regular">בתגובה</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">שכמו</span> <span class="regular">נורתה</span> <span class="regular">מפי</span> <span class="regular">באופן</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">מתוכנן</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">נזכרתי</span> <span class="regular">שלקח</span> <span class="regular">לי</span> <span class="regular">יותר</span> <span class="regular">משנה</span> <span class="regular">להעביר</span> <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">ילד</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">בינקותו</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">מחדר</span> <span class="regular">השינה</span> <span class="regular">שלנו</span> <span class="regular">לחדר</span> <span class="regular">משלו</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">חשבתי</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">כך</span> <span class="regular">שהנקתי</span> <span class="regular">תקופה</span> <span class="regular">ארוכה</span> <span class="regular">מאוד</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ועל</span> <span class="regular">הקושי</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span> <span class="regular">לסמוך</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">ילדיי</span> <span class="regular">ולשחרר</span> <span class="regular">אותם</span> <span class="regular">בלי</span> <span class="regular">לדאוג</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">אחר</span> <span class="regular">כך</span> <span class="regular">חזרתי</span> <span class="regular">להווה</span> <span class="regular">ולעתיד</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ושכחתי</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl" style="text-indent:0;"><span class="regular"> </span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl" style="text-indent:0;"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">נולדתי</span> <span class="regular">וגדלתי</span> <span class="regular">בקיבוץ</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">בבית</span> <span class="regular">הילדים</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">מרחק</span> <span class="regular">שביל</span> <span class="regular">ארוך</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">במורד</span> <span class="regular">גבעה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">מבית</span> <span class="regular">ההורים</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">מרחק</span> <span class="regular">שהיה</span> <span class="regular">נמתח</span> <span class="regular">אף</span> <span class="regular">יותר</span> <span class="regular">עם</span> <span class="regular">רדת</span> <span class="regular">הערב</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">מרחק</span> <span class="regular">שלילות</span> <span class="regular">סערה</span> <span class="regular">חשוכים</span> <span class="regular">הפכוהו</span> <span class="regular">לדרך</span> <span class="regular">מאיימת</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">כמו</span> <span class="regular">במעבה</span> <span class="regular">יער</span> <span class="regular">רדוף</span> <span class="regular">רוחות</span> <span class="regular">ומפלצות</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">פעם</span> <span class="regular">רצתי</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">הדרך</span> <span class="regular">הזאת</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ברגליים</span> <span class="regular">יחפות</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">לעתים</span> <span class="regular">קרובות</span> <span class="regular">יותר</span> <span class="regular">עשיתי</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">הדרך</span> <span class="regular">לבית</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">סבא</span> <span class="regular">וסבתא</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">בקצה</span> <span class="regular">השני</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">הגבעה</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">משם</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">החזירו</span> <span class="regular">אותי</span> <span class="regular">מעולם</span> <span class="regular">אל</span> <span class="regular">מיטתי</span> <span class="regular">בבית</span> <span class="regular">הילדים</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">הדלת</span> <span class="regular">הייתה</span> <span class="regular">נפתחת</span> <span class="regular">ובלי</span> <span class="regular">שאלות</span> <span class="regular">הייתי</span> <span class="regular">נעלמת</span> <span class="regular">בתוך</span> <span class="regular">שמיכת</span> <span class="regular">נוצות</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">הספה</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">סבא</span> <span class="regular">וסבתא</span> <span class="regular">בסלון</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">לפנות</span> <span class="regular">בוקר</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">עוד</span> <span class="regular">לפני</span> <span class="regular">שהמטפלת</span> <span class="regular">באה</span> <span class="regular">להעיר</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">ילדי</span> <span class="regular">הגן</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">אל</span> <span class="regular">כוסות</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">קרום</span> <span class="regular">חלב</span> <span class="regular">עבה</span> <span class="regular">עם</span> <span class="regular">מעט</span> <span class="regular">שוקו</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">סבתא</span> <span class="regular">הייתה</span> <span class="regular">מעירה</span> <span class="regular">אותי</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">לבושה</span> <span class="regular">בפיג</span><span class="regular">'</span><span class="regular">מה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">הייתי</span> <span class="regular">מתגנבת</span> <span class="regular">בחזרה</span> <span class="regular">אל</span> <span class="regular">המיטה</span> <span class="regular">בבית</span> <span class="regular">הילדים</span> <span class="regular">ואיש</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">ידע</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">קורות</span> <span class="regular">הלילה</span> <span class="regular">שעבר</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">היום</span> <span class="regular">אני</span> <span class="regular">חושבת</span> <span class="regular">שאולי</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">הייתי</span> <span class="regular">לבדי</span> <span class="regular">בדרך</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">אולי</span> <span class="regular">הדמויות</span> <span class="regular">שהתעקשתי</span> <span class="regular">לראות</span> <span class="regular">מתוך</span> <span class="regular">החושך</span> <span class="regular">היו</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">מתגנבי</span> <span class="regular">לילה</span> <span class="regular">חשאיים</span> <span class="regular">נוספים</span><span class="regular">...</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl" style="text-indent:0;"><span class="regular"> </span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl" style="text-indent:0;"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">כשנולדו</span> <span class="regular">ילדיי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">רציתי</span> <span class="regular">אותם</span> <span class="regular">הכי</span> <span class="regular">קרוב</span> <span class="regular">שאפשר</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">בלי</span> <span class="regular">גבעה</span> <span class="regular">ובלי</span> <span class="regular">דרך</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">מיד</span> <span class="regular">אחרי</span> <span class="regular">הלידה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">עוד</span> <span class="regular">בבית</span> <span class="regular">החולים</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ביקשתי</span> <span class="regular">שיהיו</span> <span class="regular">אתי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">הזמן</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">פעלתי</span> <span class="regular">אינסטנקטיבית</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">מתוך</span> <span class="regular">מחשבה</span> <span class="regular">עמוקה</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">המחשבה</span> <span class="regular">באה</span> <span class="regular">רק</span> <span class="regular">לאחר</span> <span class="regular">שנים</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ממרחק</span> <span class="regular">גאוגרפי</span> <span class="regular">ניכר</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">רק</span> <span class="regular">אז</span> <span class="regular">יכולתי</span> <span class="regular">להתבונן</span> <span class="regular">לראשונה</span> <span class="regular">בילדותי</span> <span class="regular">בקיבוץ</span> <span class="regular">שריד</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">באמא</span> <span class="regular">ובסבתא</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">הייתי</span> <span class="regular">צריכה</span> <span class="regular">להתרחק</span> <span class="regular">מהן</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">כמו</span> <span class="regular">להרחיק</span> <span class="regular">ספר</span> <span class="regular">כדי</span> <span class="regular">למקד</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">הראייה</span> <span class="regular">כשהעיניים</span> <span class="regular">נחלשות</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">כדי</span> <span class="regular">לראות</span> <span class="regular">ברור</span> <span class="regular">ולהבין</span> <span class="regular">אותן</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">אחת</span> <span class="regular">באימהותה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">בילדות</span> <span class="regular">שממנה</span> <span class="regular">צמחה</span> <span class="regular">לאמא</span> <span class="regular">שהפכה</span> <span class="regular">להיות</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ולזהות</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">עצמי</span> <span class="regular">בתוך</span> <span class="regular">השרשרת</span> <span class="regular">הזו</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">בגיל</span> <span class="regular">ארבעים</span> <span class="regular">וארבע</span> <span class="regular">ארזתי</span> <span class="regular">שש</span> <span class="regular">מזוודות</span> <span class="regular">גדולות</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ויחד</span> <span class="regular">עם</span> <span class="regular">משפחתי</span> <span class="regular">יצאנו</span> <span class="regular">להרפתקת</span> <span class="regular">חיים</span> <span class="regular">מעבר</span> <span class="regular">לים</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">בעקבות</span> <span class="regular">עבודתו</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">בעלי</span> <span class="regular">העתקנו</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">חיינו</span> <span class="regular">לדאלאס</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">טקסס</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">חשבנו</span> <span class="regular">שבחוויה</span> <span class="regular">הזו</span> <span class="regular">נממש</span> <span class="regular">הזדמנות</span> <span class="regular">לראות</span> <span class="regular">עולם</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ללמוד</span> <span class="regular">תרבות</span> <span class="regular">ושפה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ואחרי</span> <span class="regular">התלבטות</span> <span class="regular">קצרה</span> <span class="regular">החלטנו</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">לראשונה</span> <span class="regular">בחיינו</span> <span class="regular">המשותפים</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">להעז</span> <span class="regular">ולצאת</span> <span class="regular">לדרך</span> <span class="regular">שלא</span> <span class="regular">יכולנו</span> <span class="regular">לנחש</span> <span class="regular">לאן</span> <span class="regular">תוביל</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">הגענו</span> <span class="regular">עם</span> <span class="regular">שני</span> <span class="regular">ילדים</span> <span class="regular">שחונכו</span> <span class="regular">בקיבוץ</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">יפתח</span> <span class="regular">בכורי</span> <span class="regular">היה</span> <span class="regular">בן</span> <span class="regular">שלוש</span><span class="regular">־</span><span class="regular">עשרה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ולו</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">בתי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">בת</span> <span class="regular">שמונה</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">ילדים</span> <span class="regular">שגדלו</span> <span class="regular">בקרבת</span> <span class="regular">משפחה</span> <span class="regular">גדולה</span> <span class="regular">ועוטפת</span> <span class="regular">ורצו</span> <span class="regular">יחפים</span> <span class="regular">בשבילי</span> <span class="regular">המקום</span> <span class="regular">שבו</span> <span class="regular">גדלתי</span> <span class="regular">אני</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ולפניי</span> <span class="regular">גדלו</span> <span class="regular">בו</span> <span class="regular">אמי</span> <span class="regular">וסבתי</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">ילדיי</span> <span class="regular">הכירו</span> <span class="regular">אישית</span> <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">עובר</span> <span class="regular">אורח</span> <span class="regular">בשביל</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ותושבי</span> <span class="regular">המקום</span> <span class="regular">הכירו</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">שמם</span> <span class="regular">וידעו</span> <span class="regular">למי</span> <span class="regular">הם</span> <span class="regular">שייכים</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regularbold">שייכות</span> <span class="regular">היא</span> <span class="regular">מילה</span> <span class="regular">מרכזית</span> <span class="regular">ביכולת</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span> <span class="regular">לנסח</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">הקשר</span> <span class="regular">למקום</span> <span class="regular">שבו</span> <span class="regular">גדלתי</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">כשנולד</span> <span class="regular">בני</span> <span class="regular">הבכור</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">רציתי</span> <span class="regular">זאת</span> <span class="regular">גם</span> <span class="regular">בשבילו</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">רציתי</span> <span class="regular">שיגדל</span> <span class="regular">במקום</span> <span class="regular">שבו</span> <span class="regular">ירגיש</span> <span class="regular">שייך</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">מוגן</span> <span class="regular">ומוכר</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">גם</span> <span class="regular">כשגרנו</span> <span class="regular">מחוץ</span> <span class="regular">לקיבוץ</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">הקפדנו</span> <span class="regular">להסיע</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">ילדינו</span> <span class="regular">להתחנך</span> <span class="regular">בגן</span> <span class="regular">הילדים</span> <span class="regular">שבו</span> <span class="regular">גדלתי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">באותה</span> <span class="regular">החצר</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">אצל</span> <span class="regular">אותה</span> <span class="regular">הגננת</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">שנים</span> <span class="regular">אחר</span> <span class="regular">כך</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">כשנפתחה</span> <span class="regular">ההזדמנות</span> <span class="regular">לבנות</span> <span class="regular">בית</span> <span class="regular">בהרחבה</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">קיבוץ</span> <span class="regular">שריד</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">החלטנו</span> <span class="regular">לחזור</span> <span class="regular">הביתה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">לקיבוץ</span> <span class="regular">המתחדש</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">שכבר</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">הייתה</span> <span class="regular">בו</span> <span class="regular">לינה</span> <span class="regular">משותפת</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">לאורך</span> <span class="regular">השנים</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">באתי</span> <span class="regular">חשבון</span> <span class="regular">עם</span> <span class="regular">החינוך</span> <span class="regular">המשותף</span> <span class="regular">שבו</span> <span class="regular">גדלתי</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">העדפתי</span> <span class="regular">לזכור</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">הדברים</span> <span class="regular">הטובים</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">לחטט</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">לשאול</span> <span class="regular">שאלות</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">הייתי</span> <span class="regular">עסוקה</span> <span class="regular">מאוד</span> <span class="regular">במטלות</span> <span class="regular">ההווה</span> <span class="regular">ודאגות</span> <span class="regular">העתיד</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">העבר</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">העיק</span> <span class="regular">עלי</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl" style="text-indent:0;"><span class="regular"> </span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl" style="text-indent:0;"><span class="הפקת מהדורה אלקטרונית על ידי מנדלי מוכר-ספרים ברשת"></span><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">ב</span><span class="regular">־</span><span class="regular">2012</span> <span class="regular">הגענו</span> <span class="regular">לטקסס</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ובערב</span> <span class="regular">שבת</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">כאשר</span> <span class="regular">לראשונה</span> <span class="regular">בחיינו</span> <span class="regular">ישבנו</span> <span class="regular">לשולחן</span> <span class="regular">כמשפחה</span> <span class="regular">גרעינית</span><span class="regular">, "</span><span class="regular">רק</span><span class="regular">"</span> <span class="regular">אבא</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">אמא</span> <span class="regular">ושני</span> <span class="regular">ילדים</span> <span class="regular">סביב</span> <span class="regular">שולחן</span> <span class="regular">השבת</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">הציף</span> <span class="regular">אותי</span> <span class="regular">פחד</span> <span class="regular">גדול</span> <span class="regular">שאולי</span> <span class="regular">טעינו</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">חששתי</span> <span class="regular">שאנחנו</span> <span class="regular">מקנים</span> <span class="regular">לילדנו</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">חוויית</span> <span class="regular">העולם</span> <span class="regular">הגדול</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">אבל</span> <span class="regular">תחושת</span> <span class="regular">שייכות</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">תהיה</span> <span class="regular">להם</span> <span class="regular">בתוך</span> <span class="regular">הזרות</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">ארץ</span> <span class="regular">רחוקה</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">בשנה</span> <span class="regular">הראשונה</span> <span class="regular">השקעתי</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">כולי</span> <span class="regular">בסיוע</span> <span class="regular">לילדים</span> <span class="regular">להיקלט</span> <span class="regular">במערכות</span> <span class="regular">החינוך</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">בכל</span> <span class="regular">כוחי</span> <span class="regular">השתדלתי</span> <span class="regular">לשמר</span> <span class="regular">הרגלים</span> <span class="regular">מהארץ</span><span class="regular">:</span> <span class="regular">ארוחות</span> <span class="regular">שישי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">הדלקת</span> <span class="regular">נרות</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">חגים</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">שירים</span> <span class="regular">וסיפורים</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">לראשונה</span> <span class="regular">מאז</span> <span class="regular">נולדו</span> <span class="regular">הקדשתי</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">זמני</span> <span class="regular">לאימהות</span> <span class="regular">ולא</span> <span class="regular">לימדתי</span> <span class="regular">ועבדתי</span> <span class="regular">שעות</span> <span class="regular">ארוכות</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">חוויית</span> <span class="regular">הבדידות</span> <span class="regular">במקום</span> <span class="regular">החדש</span> <span class="regular">פינתה</span> <span class="regular">לנו</span> <span class="regular">זמן</span> <span class="regular">להיות</span> <span class="regular">ביחד</span> <span class="regular">והילדים</span> <span class="regular">אהבו</span> <span class="regular">לשאול</span> <span class="regular">שאלות</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">ילדותי</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">מצאתי</span> <span class="regular">עצמי</span> <span class="regular">"</span><span class="regular">משווקת</span><span class="regular">"</span> <span class="regular">לילדיי</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">חוויות</span> <span class="regular">בית</span> <span class="regular">הילדים</span> <span class="regular">שבקיבוץ</span> <span class="regular">כאילו</span> <span class="regular">היה</span> <span class="regular">זה</span> <span class="regular">סיפור</span> <span class="regular">הרפתקאות</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">הייתי</span> <span class="regular">רגילה</span> <span class="regular">לכך</span> <span class="regular">שזה</span> <span class="regular">הסיפור</span> <span class="regular">שכולם</span> <span class="regular">מתעניינים</span> <span class="regular">בו</span> <span class="regular">-</span> <span class="regular">בספרות</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">בקולנוע</span> <span class="regular">ובמחקר</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">יותר</span> <span class="regular">מכל</span> <span class="regular">דבר</span> <span class="regular">אחר</span> <span class="regular">אהבו</span> <span class="regular">ילדיי</span> <span class="regular">לשמוע</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">הלילות</span> <span class="regular">בבית</span> <span class="regular">הילדים</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ולא</span> <span class="regular">פעם</span> <span class="regular">שאלו</span><span class="regular">: "</span><span class="regular">אבל</span> <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">זה</span> <span class="regular">באמת</span> <span class="regular">קרה</span><span class="regular">?"</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">הזמן</span> <span class="regular">עבר</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">וכשהרגשתי</span> <span class="regular">שהילדים</span> <span class="regular">מצאו</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">מקומם</span> <span class="regular">ורכשו</span> <span class="regular">שפה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">נרשמתי</span> <span class="regular">ללימודים</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">באחד</span> <span class="regular">הקורסים</span> <span class="regular">מצאתי</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">עצמי</span> <span class="regular">לומדת</span> <span class="regular">לימודי</span> <span class="regular">היסטוריה</span> <span class="regular">ותרבות</span> <span class="regular">אמריקאית</span> <span class="regular">בכיתה</span> <span class="regular">אחת</span> <span class="regular">עם</span> <span class="regular">נשים</span> <span class="regular">מהגרות</span> <span class="regular">מכל</span> <span class="regular">העולם</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">רוב</span> <span class="regular">הנשים</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">כמוני</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">הגיעו</span> <span class="regular">לטקסס</span> <span class="regular">בעקבות</span> <span class="regular">עבודתו</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">בן</span> <span class="regular">זוגן</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">רובן</span> <span class="regular">ככולן</span> <span class="regular">היו</span> <span class="regular">בעלות</span> <span class="regular">מקצוע</span> <span class="regular">ואימהות</span> <span class="regular">לילדים</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">היו</span> <span class="regular">שם</span> <span class="regular">נשים</span> <span class="regular">מרתקות</span> <span class="regular">מיפן</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">פולין</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">דרום</span> <span class="regular">קוריאה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">סין</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">מקסיקו</span> <span class="regular">ואפילו</span> <span class="regular">עיראק</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">יום</span> <span class="regular">אחד</span> <span class="regular">ביקשה</span> <span class="regular">המרצה</span> <span class="regular">שכל</span> <span class="regular">אחת</span> <span class="regular">מאתנו</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">בתורה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">תכין</span> <span class="regular">מצגת</span> <span class="regular">קצרה</span> <span class="regular">ובה</span> <span class="regular">תספר</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">ארץ</span> <span class="regular">מוצאה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">תרבותה</span> <span class="regular">וילדותה</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">ידעתי</span> <span class="regular">מה</span> <span class="regular">אספר</span> <span class="regular">אחרי</span> <span class="regular">הסיפורים</span> <span class="regular">המרתקים</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">סלווקה</span> <span class="regular">מקראקוב</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">לונה</span> <span class="regular">שברחה</span> <span class="regular">מבגדד</span><span class="regular">...</span> <span class="regular">כשהגיע</span> <span class="regular">תורי</span> <span class="regular">אמרתי</span> <span class="regular">בפשטות</span><span class="regular">: "</span><span class="regular">אני</span> <span class="regular">מישראל</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">גדלתי</span> <span class="regular">בקיבוץ</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">בבית</span> <span class="regular">ילדים</span><span class="regular">".</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">עיני</span> <span class="regular">חברותיי</span> <span class="regular">נמלאו</span> <span class="regular">פליאה</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">אף</span> <span class="regular">אחת</span> <span class="regular">מהן</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">שמעה</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">קיבוץ</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ודאי</span> <span class="regular">שלא</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">"</span><span class="regular">חינוך</span> <span class="regular">משותף</span><span class="regular">".</span> <span class="regular">מצאתי</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">עצמי</span> <span class="regular">במרכז</span> <span class="regular">תשומת</span> <span class="regular">ה</span><span class="regular">לב</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">סיפרתי</span> <span class="regular">וסיפרתי</span> <span class="regular">בשטף</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ובעיקר</span> <span class="regular">תפסה</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">תשומת</span> <span class="regular">לבי</span> <span class="regular">שאלה</span> <span class="regular">אחת</span> <span class="regular">ששאלו</span> <span class="regular">רבות</span> <span class="regular">מהן</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">אחת</span> <span class="regular">בתורה</span><span class="regular">: "</span><span class="regular">איך</span> <span class="regular">אמא</span> <span class="regular">יכולה</span> <span class="regular">להשאיר</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">התינוק</span> <span class="regular">שלה</span> <span class="regular">עם</span> <span class="regular">ילדים</span> <span class="regular">אחרים</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">לבדו</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">וללכת</span><span class="regular">?"</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">הן</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">התעכבו</span> <span class="regular">כלל</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">החוויה</span> <span class="regular">הילדית</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">כך</span> <span class="regular">הסעירה</span> <span class="regular">אותן</span> <span class="regular">השאלה</span> <span class="regular">האימהית</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">לראשונה</span> <span class="regular">בחיי</span> <span class="regular">חשבתי</span> <span class="regular">בהקשר</span> <span class="regular">הזה</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">אמא</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span> <span class="regular">ועל</span> <span class="regular">סבתא</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">לראשונה</span> <span class="regular">שאלתי</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">עצמי</span> <span class="regular">מה</span> <span class="regular">הן</span> <span class="regular">חשו</span> <span class="regular">כאימהות</span> <span class="regular">צעירות</span> <span class="regular">בתוך</span> <span class="regular">אורח</span> <span class="regular">החיים</span> <span class="regular">הזה</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">בסוף</span> <span class="regular">הסיפור</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">שנמשך</span> <span class="regular">הרבה</span> <span class="regular">למעלה</span> <span class="regular">מהמתוכנן</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ניגשה</span> <span class="regular">אליי</span> <span class="regular">אישה</span> <span class="regular">צעירה</span> <span class="regular">ממקסיקו</span> <span class="regular">ואמרה</span> <span class="regular">כשדמעות</span> <span class="regular">בעיניה</span><span class="regular">: "</span><span class="regular">אני</span> <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">כך</span> <span class="regular">לבד</span> <span class="regular">כאן</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">בעלי</span> <span class="regular">עובד</span> <span class="regular">מהבוקר</span> <span class="regular">עד</span> <span class="regular">הלילה</span> <span class="regular">ואני</span> <span class="regular">מגדלת</span> <span class="regular">שלושה</span> <span class="regular">ילדים</span> <span class="regular">קטנים</span> <span class="regular">בלי</span> <span class="regular">שפה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">בלי</span> <span class="regular">משפחה</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">כשסיפרת</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">הקיבוץ</span> <span class="regular">והחינוך</span> <span class="regular">המשותף</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">חשבתי</span> <span class="regular">לעצמי</span> <span class="regular">כמה</span> <span class="regular">הייתי</span> <span class="regular">רוצה</span> <span class="regular">לחלוק</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">האימהות</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span> <span class="regular">עם</span> <span class="regular">נשים</span> <span class="regular">נוספות</span><span class="regular">".</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">אחרות</span> <span class="regular">הגיבו</span> <span class="regular">בזעזוע</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">הייתה</span> <span class="regular">מישהי</span> <span class="regular">שהסיפור</span> <span class="regular">אפילו</span> <span class="regular">הצחיק</span> <span class="regular">אותה</span><span class="regular">. "</span><span class="regular">זה</span> <span class="regular">נשמע</span> <span class="regular">לי</span> <span class="regular">כמו</span> <span class="regular">כת</span> <span class="regular">הזויה</span><span class="regular">",</span> <span class="regular">היא</span> <span class="regular">אמרה</span> <span class="regular">מחויכת</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">היו</span> <span class="regular">נשים</span> <span class="regular">ששאלו</span> <span class="regular">המון</span> <span class="regular">שאלות</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ולהפתעתי</span> <span class="regular">מיעטו</span> <span class="regular">להתעכב</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">זכרונות</span> <span class="regular">הילדות</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">השאלה</span> <span class="regular">המרכזית</span> <span class="regular">הייתה</span> <span class="regular">האימהות</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">בסופו</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">השיעור</span> <span class="regular">אני</span> <span class="regular">עצמי</span> <span class="regular">הייתי</span> <span class="regular">מבולבלת</span> <span class="regular">מעוצמת</span> <span class="regular">התגובות</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">התיישבתי</span> <span class="regular">לכתוב</span> <span class="regular">לעצמי</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">הדברים</span> <span class="regular">שנאמרו</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">שלא</span> <span class="regular">אשכח</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ואז</span> <span class="regular">ניגשה</span> <span class="regular">אלי</span> <span class="regular">מנחת</span> <span class="regular">הקבוצה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">הניחה</span> <span class="regular">יד</span> <span class="regular">עדינה</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">כתפי</span> <span class="regular">ושאלה</span> <span class="regular">שאלה</span> <span class="regular">אחת</span> <span class="regular">נוספת</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ללא</span> <span class="regular">טיפה</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">ציניות</span><span class="regular">: "</span><span class="regular">אם</span> <span class="regular">כך</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">מי</span> <span class="regular">אהבו</span> <span class="regular">האימהות</span> <span class="regular">יותר</span><span class="regular">?</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">ילדיהן</span> <span class="regular">או</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">הסוציאליזם</span><span class="regular">?"</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">השאלה</span> <span class="regular">קוממה</span> <span class="regular">אותי</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">ספונטנית</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">עניתי</span> <span class="regular">בכעס</span> <span class="regular">שאני</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">בטוחה</span> <span class="regular">שראוי</span> <span class="regular">להציב</span> <span class="regular">משוואה</span> <span class="regular">כזו</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">הגבתי</span> <span class="regular">כפי</span> <span class="regular">שכנראה</span> <span class="regular">נהגתי</span> <span class="regular">להגיב</span> <span class="regular">תמיד</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">והוספתי</span><span class="regular">: "</span><span class="regular">ככה</span> <span class="regular">זה</span> <span class="regular">היה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">מה</span> <span class="regular">הטעם</span> <span class="regular">לחטט</span> <span class="regular">בעבר</span><span class="regular">..."</span> <span class="regular">היא</span> <span class="regular">המשיכה</span> <span class="regular">לעמוד</span> <span class="regular">עוד</span> <span class="regular">רגע</span> <span class="regular">לצדי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">והבנתי</span> <span class="regular">שלא</span> <span class="regular">הייתה</span> <span class="regular">בה</span> <span class="regular">כוונה</span> <span class="regular">להכעיס</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">"</span><span class="regular">זה</span> <span class="regular">מעניין</span><span class="regular">",</span> <span class="regular">היא</span> <span class="regular">אמרה</span><span class="regular">. "</span><span class="regular">הקשבתי</span> <span class="regular">לך</span> <span class="regular">וחשבתי</span> <span class="regular">שאפשר</span> <span class="regular">ורצוי</span> <span class="regular">להביט</span> <span class="regular">בזה</span> <span class="regular">ממרחק</span> <span class="regular">הזמן</span> <span class="regular">ולראות</span> <span class="regular">מה</span> <span class="regular">ניתן</span> <span class="regular">ללמוד</span> <span class="regular">מכך</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">אותי</span> <span class="regular">כאישה</span> <span class="regular">וכאם</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">מתרבות</span> <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">כך</span> <span class="regular">רחוקה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">זה</span> <span class="regular">מסקרן</span> <span class="regular">מאוד</span><span class="regular">:</span> <span class="regular">איזו</span> <span class="regular">תשובה</span> <span class="regular">דרך</span> <span class="regular">החיים</span> <span class="regular">הזאת</span> <span class="regular">יכולה</span> <span class="regular">לספק</span> <span class="regular">לשאלת</span> <span class="regular">האימהות</span> <span class="regular">המודרנית</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">להתחבטות</span> <span class="regular">הבלתי</span> <span class="regular">נגמרת</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">חברותיי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">נשים</span> <span class="regular">רבות</span> <span class="regular">בעולם</span> <span class="regular">המערבי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">בין</span> <span class="regular">קריירה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">זוגיות</span> <span class="regular">ואימהות</span><span class="regular">?"</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl" style="text-indent:0;"><span class="regular"> </span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl" style="text-indent:0;"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">ימים</span> <span class="regular">רבים</span> <span class="regular">חשבתי</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">השיחה</span> <span class="regular">הזו</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">כך</span> <span class="regular">שנשים</span> <span class="regular">מתרבויות</span> <span class="regular">שונות</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">שמעולם</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">שמעו</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">קיבוץ</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">נסערו</span> <span class="regular">מעניין</span> <span class="regular">מרכזי</span> <span class="regular">אחד</span><span class="regular">:</span> <span class="regular">איך</span> <span class="regular">פעלו</span> <span class="regular">והרגישו</span> <span class="regular">האימהות</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">האם</span> <span class="regular">האידיאולוגיה</span> <span class="regular">גברה</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">האינסטינקט</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">איך</span> <span class="regular">מרגישות</span> <span class="regular">הנשים</span> <span class="regular">הללו</span> <span class="regular">בפרספקטיבה</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">זמן</span><span class="regular">?</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">היו</span> <span class="regular">לי</span> <span class="regular">תשובות</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">שהרי</span> <span class="regular">הכרתי רק</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">הצד</span> <span class="regular">הילדי</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">חשבתי</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">כך</span> <span class="regular">שאפילו</span> <span class="regular">עם</span> <span class="regular">אמא</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span> <span class="regular">מעולם</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">ישבתי</span> <span class="regular">לשיחה</span> <span class="regular">עמוקה</span> <span class="regular">בנושא</span> <span class="regular">הזה</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">בעוד</span> <span class="regular">שנים</span> <span class="regular">בודדות</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">יחיו</span> <span class="regular">עוד</span> <span class="regular">נשים</span> <span class="regular">שגידלו</span> <span class="regular">כך</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">ילדיהן</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ולכן</span> <span class="regular">חשבתי</span> <span class="regular">שזה</span> <span class="regular">הזמן</span> <span class="regular">לשאול</span> <span class="regular">ולהקשיב</span> <span class="regular">באמת</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">הפכתי</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">השאלות</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">חברותיי</span> <span class="regular">הזרות</span> <span class="regular">לשאלות</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ויצאתי</span> <span class="regular">למסע</span> <span class="regular">אל</span> <span class="regular">סיפורן</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">האימהות</span> <span class="regular">בקיבוץ</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl" style="text-indent:0;"><span class="regular"> </span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl" style="text-indent:0;"><span class="הפקת מהדורה אלקטרונית על ידי מנדלי מוכר-ספרים ברשת"></span><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">התחלתי</span> <span class="regular">לחפש</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">האימהות</span> <span class="regular">ההן</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">רציתי</span> <span class="regular">לבנות</span> <span class="regular">קולאז</span><span class="regular">'</span> <span class="regular">מגוון</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">שיהיו</span> <span class="regular">בו</span> <span class="regular">נשים</span> <span class="regular">מעשורים</span> <span class="regular">שונים</span> <span class="regular">ומזרמים</span> <span class="regular">שונים</span> <span class="regular">בתנועה</span> <span class="regular">הקיבוצית</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">נשים</span> <span class="regular">שעברו</span> <span class="regular">סוגים</span> <span class="regular">שונים</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">ילדו</span><span class="regular">ּ</span><span class="regular">ת</span> <span class="regular">טרם</span> <span class="regular">היותן</span> <span class="regular">אימהות</span> <span class="regular">בקיבוץ</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">רציתי</span> <span class="regular">סיפור</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">לילה</span> <span class="regular">אחד</span> <span class="regular">או</span> <span class="regular">קיבוץ</span> <span class="regular">אחד</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">אלא</span> <span class="regular">בחינה</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">אורח</span> <span class="regular">חיים</span> <span class="regular">ייחודי</span> <span class="regular">מהפרספקטיבות</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">אימהות</span> <span class="regular">שונות</span> <span class="regular">שכל</span> <span class="regular">אחת</span> <span class="regular">מהן</span> <span class="regular">עשתה</span> <span class="regular">כמיטב</span> <span class="regular">יכולתה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">לפי</span> <span class="regular">הבנתה</span> <span class="regular">וכוחותיה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">כדי</span> <span class="regular">להיות</span> <span class="regular">אמא</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">בשיחותיי</span> <span class="regular">הארוכות</span> <span class="regular">עם</span> <span class="regular">האימהות</span> <span class="regular">היה</span> <span class="regular">חשוב</span> <span class="regular">לי</span> <span class="regular">לאפשר</span> <span class="regular">להן</span> <span class="regular">לספר</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">סיפורן</span> <span class="regular">כפי</span> <span class="regular">שהן</span> <span class="regular">בוחרות</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">במידת</span> <span class="regular">החשיפה</span> <span class="regular">הנוחה</span> <span class="regular">להן</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">היו</span> <span class="regular">שבחרו</span> <span class="regular">לשמור</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">שמות</span> <span class="regular">ילדיהן</span> <span class="regular">מחוץ</span> <span class="regular">לסיפור</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">לאפשר</span> <span class="regular">להם</span> <span class="regular">פרטיות</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">לעומתן</span> <span class="regular">היו</span> <span class="regular">כאלה</span> <span class="regular">שהרגישו</span> <span class="regular">שציון</span> <span class="regular">שמות</span> <span class="regular">ילדיהן</span> <span class="regular">והשיחה</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">ילדותם</span> <span class="regular">זו</span> <span class="regular">הזדמנות</span> <span class="regular">להעביר</span> <span class="regular">להם</span> <span class="regular">מסר</span> <span class="regular">שלא</span> <span class="regular">נאמר</span> <span class="regular">עד</span> <span class="regular">כה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">שאולי</span> <span class="regular">היה</span> <span class="regular">מכאיב</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">רגיש</span> <span class="regular">או</span> <span class="regular">מודחק</span> <span class="regular">והנה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">בצידוק</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">מונולוג</span> <span class="regular">לספר</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">הדברים</span> <span class="regular">יכולים</span> <span class="regular">להיאמר</span> <span class="regular">ולהגיע</span> <span class="regular">כך</span> <span class="regular">גם</span> <span class="regular">אליהם</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">אישה</span> <span class="regular">ודרכה</span> <span class="regular">להיחשף</span> <span class="regular">ולספר</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">סיפורה</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">הזמן</span> <span class="regular">הטרידה</span> <span class="regular">אותי</span> <span class="regular">השאלה</span><span class="regular">:</span> <span class="regular">מה</span> <span class="regular">עוד</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">נאמר</span><span class="regular">?</span> <span class="regular">מה</span> <span class="regular">חשוב</span> <span class="regular">לשאול</span><span class="regular">?</span> <span class="regular">רציתי</span> <span class="regular">שכל</span> <span class="regular">הנשים</span> <span class="regular">שאשוחח</span> <span class="regular">אתן</span> <span class="regular">יספרו</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">אימהותן</span> <span class="regular">בגוף</span> <span class="regular">ראשון</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">בשם</span> <span class="regular">מלא</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">מונולוגים</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">אימהות</span> <span class="regular">בחינוך</span> <span class="regular">המשותף</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">אחת</span> <span class="regular">והחוויה</span> <span class="regular">הפרטית</span> <span class="regular">שלה</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">בלי</span> <span class="regular">לשפוט</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">בלי</span> <span class="regular">לבקר</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">בלי</span> <span class="regular">להלל</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">רציתי</span> <span class="regular">לשמוע</span> <span class="regular">אותן</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">לפני</span> <span class="regular">שיהיה</span> <span class="regular">מאוחר</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">הרגשתי</span> <span class="regular">שיש</span> <span class="regular">דחיפות</span> <span class="regular">לשוחח</span> <span class="regular">עם</span> <span class="regular">הנשים</span> <span class="regular">לפני</span> <span class="regular">שישכחו</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">המבוגרות</span> <span class="regular">ביותר</span> <span class="regular">שהצלחתי</span> <span class="regular">לראיין</span> <span class="regular">הן</span> <span class="regular">ילידות</span> <span class="regular">שנות</span> <span class="regular">העשרים</span><span class="regular">;</span> <span class="regular">מעשור</span> <span class="regular">זה</span> <span class="regular">נותרו</span> <span class="regular">מעטות</span> <span class="regular">שבכוחן</span> <span class="regular">לזכור</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">להיחשף</span> <span class="regular">ולספר</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">אימהותן</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">האם</span> <span class="regular">הצעירה</span> <span class="regular">ביותר</span> <span class="regular">היא</span> <span class="regular">ילידת</span> <span class="regular">ראשית</span> <span class="regular">שנות</span> <span class="regular">החמישים</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">ב</span><span class="regular">־</span><span class="regular">1991</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">כשנחת</span> <span class="regular">הטיל</span> <span class="regular">הראשון</span> <span class="regular">שירה</span> <span class="regular">סדאם</span> <span class="regular">חוסיין</span> <span class="regular">במלחמת</span> <span class="regular">המפרץ</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">חוסלה</span> <span class="regular">באחת</span> <span class="regular">שיטת</span> <span class="regular">הלינה</span> <span class="regular">המשותפת</span> <span class="regular">באחרוני</span> <span class="regular">הקיבוצים</span> <span class="regular">בארץ</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ועל</span> <span class="regular">כן</span> <span class="regular">אין</span> <span class="regular">אימהות</span> <span class="regular">צעירות</span> <span class="regular">יותר</span> <span class="regular">שגידלו</span> <span class="regular">כך</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">ילדיהן</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">למעט</span> <span class="regular">קיבוץ</span> <span class="regular">ברעם</span> <span class="regular">שבצפון</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">עם</span> <span class="regular">תום</span> <span class="regular">המלחמה</span> <span class="regular">כבר</span> <span class="regular">עברו</span> <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">יתר</span> <span class="regular">הקיבוצים</span> <span class="regular">ללינה</span> <span class="regular">בבתי</span> <span class="regular">ההורים</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">אחת</span> <span class="regular">האימהות</span> <span class="regular">אמרה</span> <span class="regular">לי</span> <span class="regular">בציניות</span><span class="regular">: "</span><span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">ההשפעות</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">סטאלין</span> <span class="regular">השמיד</span> <span class="regular">סדאם</span> <span class="regular">חוסיין</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">ככה</span> <span class="regular">זכיתי</span> <span class="regular">להשכיב</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">ילדיי</span> <span class="regular">לצדי</span><span class="regular">".</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">האם</span> <span class="regular">ניתן</span> <span class="regular">ללמוד</span> <span class="regular">ממודלים</span> <span class="regular">חברתיים</span> <span class="regular">שנחיו</span> <span class="regular">בעבר</span><span class="regular">?</span> <span class="regular">האם</span> <span class="regular">יש</span> <span class="regular">טעם</span> <span class="regular">בחיטוט</span> <span class="regular">במה</span> <span class="regular">שהיה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">במי</span> <span class="regular">שהיינו</span><span class="regular">?</span> <span class="regular">האם</span> <span class="regular">יש</span> <span class="regular">ערך</span> <span class="regular">בריכוז</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">זכרונות</span> <span class="regular">וחוויות</span> <span class="regular">סוביקטיביות</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">נשים</span> <span class="regular">שונות</span> <span class="regular">שקיימו</span> <span class="regular">סוגים</span> <span class="regular">שונים</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">אימהות</span><span class="regular">?</span> <span class="regular">האם</span> <span class="regular">מה</span> <span class="regular">שמספרת</span> <span class="regular">אישה</span> <span class="regular">בערוב</span> <span class="regular">ימיה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">בדיעבד</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">לעצמה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">לסביבה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">אכן</span> <span class="regular">היה</span> <span class="regular">כך</span> <span class="regular">באמת</span><span class="regular">?</span> <span class="regular">ממה</span> <span class="regular">מושפע</span> <span class="regular">הזיכרון</span><span class="regular">?</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">מה</span> <span class="regular">עוד</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">נאמר</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">החינוך</span> <span class="regular">המשותף</span> <span class="regular">בקיבוצים</span><span class="regular">?</span> <span class="regular">האם</span> <span class="regular">הקשיבו</span> <span class="regular">אי</span><span class="regular">־</span><span class="regular">פעם</span> <span class="regular">בתשומת</span> <span class="regular">לב</span> <span class="regular">לנשים</span> <span class="regular">שהיו</span> <span class="regular">אימהות</span> <span class="regular">בתוך</span> <span class="regular">המודל</span> <span class="regular">הייחודי</span> <span class="regular">הזה</span><span class="regular">?</span> <span class="regular">האם</span> <span class="regular">ניתנה</span> <span class="regular">הדעת</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">כך</span> <span class="regular">שבפועל</span> <span class="regular">נלקחו</span> <span class="regular">מהנשים</span> <span class="regular">הללו</span> <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">התפקידים</span> <span class="regular">המסורתיים</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">אימהות</span><span class="regular">?</span> <span class="regular">רחצה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">הלבשה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">האכלה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">לקיחת</span> <span class="regular">הילד</span> <span class="regular">לרופא</span> <span class="regular">כשצריך</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">בדיקות</span> <span class="regular">התפתחות</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">השכבת</span> <span class="regular">הילדים</span> <span class="regular">לשינה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">הזכות</span> <span class="regular">להעיר</span> <span class="regular">ילד</span> <span class="regular">ליום</span> <span class="regular">חדש</span> <span class="regular">-</span> <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">התפקידים</span> <span class="regular">הללו</span> <span class="regular">היו</span> <span class="regular">בידיה</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">מטפלת</span> <span class="regular">בית</span> <span class="regular">הילדים</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">מה</span> <span class="regular">חשה</span> <span class="regular">אם</span> <span class="regular">שסמכותה</span> <span class="regular">האימהית</span> <span class="regular">הבסיסית</span> <span class="regular">איננה</span> <span class="regular">בידיה</span> <span class="regular">מהרגע</span> <span class="regular">הראשון</span><span class="regular">?</span> <span class="regular">באיזו</span> <span class="regular">מידה</span> <span class="regular">הושפע</span> <span class="regular">מכך</span> <span class="regular">הקשר</span> <span class="regular">שהלך</span> <span class="regular">ונבנה</span> <span class="regular">עם</span> <span class="regular">התינוק</span> <span class="regular">שלה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">עד</span> <span class="regular">לבגרותו</span><span class="regular">?</span> <span class="regular">עד</span> <span class="regular">לרגע</span> <span class="regular">שבו</span> <span class="regular">יצאתי</span> <span class="regular">למסע</span> <span class="regular">לאיתור</span> <span class="regular">אימהות</span> <span class="regular">שיסכימו</span> <span class="regular">לשתף</span> <span class="regular">אותי</span> <span class="regular">בסיפורן</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">עלה</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">דעתי</span> <span class="regular">עד</span> <span class="regular">כמה</span> <span class="regular">שרירותית</span> <span class="regular">הייתה</span> <span class="regular">חלוקת</span> <span class="regular">התפקידים</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">נזכרתי</span> <span class="regular">במושג</span> <span class="regular">"</span><span class="regular">שעת</span> <span class="regular">אהבה</span><span class="regular">",</span> <span class="regular">שלמעשה</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">הייתה</span> <span class="regular">אלא</span> <span class="regular">חצי</span> <span class="regular">שעה</span> <span class="regular">ביום</span> <span class="regular">שקיבלה</span> <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">אם</span> <span class="regular">לילד</span> <span class="regular">עד</span> <span class="regular">גיל</span> <span class="regular">שלוש</span> <span class="regular">ובה</span> <span class="regular">יכלה</span> <span class="regular">לצאת</span> <span class="regular">ממקום</span> <span class="regular">עבודתה</span> <span class="regular">ולבלות</span> <span class="regular">עם</span> <span class="regular">ילדה</span> <span class="regular">הפעוט</span><span class="regular">. "</span><span class="regular">שעת</span> <span class="regular">אהבה</span><span class="regular">"</span> <span class="regular">שבה</span> <span class="regular">"</span><span class="regular">מותר</span><span class="regular">"</span> <span class="regular">היה</span> <span class="regular">לה</span> <span class="regular">להקדיש</span> <span class="regular">רגעים</span> <span class="regular">אינטימיים</span> <span class="regular">לילדה</span> <span class="regular">הרך</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">בפרק</span> <span class="regular">זמן</span> <span class="regular">קצוב</span> <span class="regular">וקבוע</span> <span class="regular">מראש</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">בגיל</span> <span class="regular">הגן</span> <span class="regular">פסקה</span> <span class="regular">"</span><span class="regular">שעת</span> <span class="regular">האהבה</span><span class="regular">"</span> <span class="regular">היומית</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">חשבתי</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">כך</span> <span class="regular">שהדפוסים</span> <span class="regular">היו</span> <span class="regular">ממוסגרים</span> <span class="regular">מאוד</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ידועים</span> <span class="regular">מראש</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ורציתי</span> <span class="regular">להבין</span> <span class="regular">אם</span> <span class="regular">היו</span> <span class="regular">בכך</span> <span class="regular">הקלה</span> <span class="regular">או</span> <span class="regular">קושי</span> <span class="regular">וכמה</span> <span class="regular">מקום</span> <span class="regular">לבחירה</span> <span class="regular">אישית</span> <span class="regular">היה</span> <span class="regular">בתוך</span> <span class="regular">אימהותן</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">הנשים</span> <span class="regular">האלה</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">העיסוק</span> <span class="regular">האוניברסלי</span> <span class="regular">באימהות</span> <span class="regular">הוא</span> <span class="regular">חשוב</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">נחקר</span> <span class="regular">ומדובר</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">שרשרת</span> <span class="regular">בל</span><span class="regular">־</span><span class="regular">תינתק</span> <span class="regular">בין</span> <span class="regular">אם</span> <span class="regular">לבתה</span> <span class="regular">ואחריה</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">מה</span> <span class="regular">עובר</span> <span class="regular">בין</span> <span class="regular">הדורות</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">מה</span> <span class="regular">מושפע</span> <span class="regular">מהסביבה</span><span class="regular">?</span> <span class="regular">האם</span> <span class="regular">יש</span> <span class="regular">אינסטינקט</span> <span class="regular">אימהי</span><span class="regular">?</span> <span class="regular">מה</span> <span class="regular">מקומן</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">הבחירה</span> <span class="regular">והאידיאולוגיה</span> <span class="regular">במודל</span> <span class="regular">האימהי</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">אישה</span> <span class="regular">ואישה</span><span class="regular">?</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">ככל</span> <span class="regular">שהעמקתי</span> <span class="regular">בשיחותיי</span> <span class="regular">עם</span> <span class="regular">הנשים</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">מצאתי</span> <span class="regular">שאין</span> <span class="regular">תשובה</span> <span class="regular">אחת</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">אין</span> <span class="regular">אימהות</span> <span class="regular">אחת</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">והספר</span> <span class="regular">הזה</span> <span class="regular">הוא</span> <span class="regular">אוסף</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">תשובות</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">אישיות</span> <span class="regular">מאוד</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">כנות</span> <span class="regular">ומרתקות</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">שמהן</span> <span class="regular">עולות</span> <span class="regular">שאלות</span> <span class="regular">חדשות</span> <span class="regular">והזדמנות</span> <span class="regular">לחשיבה</span> <span class="regular">נוספת</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl" style="text-indent:0;"><span class="regular"> </span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl" style="text-indent:0;"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">במוקד</span> <span class="regular">הספר</span> <span class="regular">הזה</span> <span class="regular">עומדת</span> <span class="regular">חוויית</span> <span class="regular">האימהות</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">נשים</span> <span class="regular">שגידלו</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">ילדיהם</span> <span class="regular">באורח</span> <span class="regular">חיים</span> <span class="regular">ייחודי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">שיש</span> <span class="regular">מי</span> <span class="regular">שיגדירו</span> <span class="regular">אותו</span> <span class="regular">כ</span><span class="regular">"</span><span class="regular">ניסוי</span> <span class="regular">חברתי</span><span class="regular">".</span> <span class="regular">כיצד</span> <span class="regular">הן</span> <span class="regular">תופסות</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">אימהותן</span> <span class="regular">כיום</span><span class="regular">?</span> <span class="regular">איך</span> <span class="regular">השפיעה</span> <span class="regular">השיטה</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">דפוסי</span> <span class="regular">הקשר</span> <span class="regular">שלהן</span> <span class="regular">עם</span> <span class="regular">ילדיהן</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">אז</span> <span class="regular">והיום</span><span class="regular">?</span> <span class="regular">איך</span> <span class="regular">הן</span> <span class="regular">חיות</span> <span class="regular">עם</span> <span class="regular">הבחירות</span> <span class="regular">שעשו</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">בחירות</span> <span class="regular">שהן</span> <span class="regular">חלק</span> <span class="regular">מזהותן</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ומהם</span> <span class="regular">הרגשות</span> <span class="regular">והערכים</span> <span class="regular">שמלווים</span> <span class="regular">אותן</span> <span class="regular">סביב</span> <span class="regular">אימהותן</span> <span class="regular">הייחודית</span><span class="regular">?</span> <span class="regular">רציתי</span> <span class="regular">לדעת</span> <span class="regular">איך</span> <span class="regular">בתוך</span> <span class="regular">אותה</span> <span class="regular">שיטה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">שהיא</span> <span class="regular">תוצר</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">תנאים</span> <span class="regular">היסטוריים</span> <span class="regular">ואידיאולוגיה</span> <span class="regular">סדורה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">פעלו</span> <span class="regular">נשים</span> <span class="regular">שונות</span> <span class="regular">מתוך</span> <span class="regular">גישות</span> <span class="regular">מגוונות</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">מה</span> <span class="regular">גבר</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">מה</span><span class="regular">:</span> <span class="regular">הציווי</span> <span class="regular">האידיאולוגי</span><span class="regular">־</span><span class="regular">חברתי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">או</span> <span class="regular">הצורך</span> <span class="regular">האימהי</span><span class="regular">?</span> <span class="regular">האם</span> <span class="regular">באו</span> <span class="regular">בסתירה</span><span class="regular">?</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">הנשים</span> <span class="regular">שראיינתי</span> <span class="regular">הפכו</span> <span class="regular">להיות</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">קצת</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">האימהות</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">מצאתי</span> <span class="regular">שאין</span> <span class="regular">אם</span> <span class="regular">דומה</span> <span class="regular">לאחרת</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">אין</span> <span class="regular">חוויה</span> <span class="regular">אחידה</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">יש</span> <span class="regular">מסגרת</span> <span class="regular">חינוכית</span> <span class="regular">זהה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">שכל</span> <span class="regular">אחת</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">בזמנה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">התנהלה</span> <span class="regular">בתוכה</span> <span class="regular">כפי</span> <span class="regular">שהצליחה</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">יש</span> <span class="regular">להבין</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">הנסיבות</span> <span class="regular">ההיסטוריות</span> <span class="regular">והאידיאולוגיות</span> <span class="regular">שיצרו</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">אורח</span> <span class="regular">החיים</span> <span class="regular">הייחודי</span> <span class="regular">הזה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ניסיון</span> <span class="regular">ששרד</span> <span class="regular">כשלושה</span> <span class="regular">דורות</span> <span class="regular">ופסק</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">אורח</span> <span class="regular">חיים</span> <span class="regular">שאין</span> <span class="regular">דומה</span> <span class="regular">לו</span> <span class="regular">בחברה</span> <span class="regular">המודרנית</span> <span class="regular">ובתוכו</span> <span class="regular">אימהות</span> <span class="regular">ייחודית</span> <span class="regular">שנדרשה</span> <span class="regular">להתאים</span> <span class="regular">לתפיסת</span> <span class="regular">עולם</span> <span class="regular">מובנית</span> <span class="regular">ומוצהרת</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">היה</span> <span class="regular">לי</span> <span class="regular">דחוף</span> <span class="regular">להשמיע</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">קולן</span> <span class="regular">המיוחד</span> <span class="regular">והכן</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">נשים</span> <span class="regular">מעשורים</span> <span class="regular">שונים</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">מקיבוצים</span> <span class="regular">שונים</span> <span class="regular">ברחבי</span> <span class="regular">הארץ</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">שלכל</span> <span class="regular">אחת</span> <span class="regular">מהן</span> <span class="regular">רקע</span> <span class="regular">אחר</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">זכרונות</span> <span class="regular">פרטיים</span> <span class="regular">מילדותה</span> <span class="regular">שלה</span> <span class="regular">ומדמות</span> <span class="regular">אמה</span> <span class="regular">המתרחקת</span> <span class="regular">בזמן</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">חלומות</span> <span class="regular">ומחשבות</span> <span class="regular">כמוסים</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">האם</span> <span class="regular">שהיא</span> <span class="regular">עצמה</span> <span class="regular">הפכה</span> <span class="regular">להיות</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">הייתי</span> <span class="regular">צריכה</span> <span class="regular">לחצות</span> <span class="regular">אוקיינוס</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">להרחיק</span> <span class="regular">במקום</span> <span class="regular">ובזמן</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">כדי</span> <span class="regular">לחשוב</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">אמא</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span> <span class="regular">ועל</span> <span class="regular">סבתא</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span> <span class="regular">לפניה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">להקשיב</span> <span class="regular">לקולות</span> <span class="regular">אימהיים</span> <span class="regular">מגוונים</span> <span class="regular">ולהבין</span> <span class="regular">מעט</span> <span class="regular">יותר</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">האמא</span> <span class="regular">שאני</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">התלבטתי</span> <span class="regular">זמן</span> <span class="regular">רב</span> <span class="regular">אם</span> <span class="regular">לפתוח</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">השיח</span> <span class="regular">גם</span> <span class="regular">לאבות</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">שהרי</span> <span class="regular">גם</span> <span class="regular">להם</span> <span class="regular">הייתה</span> <span class="regular">התמודדות</span> <span class="regular">עם</span> <span class="regular">אבהותם</span> <span class="regular">בחינוך</span> <span class="regular">המשותף</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">אך</span> <span class="regular">לאחר</span> <span class="regular">קריאת</span> <span class="regular">חומרים</span> <span class="regular">העוסקים</span> <span class="regular">בהיסטוריה</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">הקיבוץ</span> <span class="regular">ושיחות</span> <span class="regular">עם</span> <span class="regular">חלק</span> <span class="regular">מהנשים</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">נוכחתי</span> <span class="regular">כי</span> <span class="regular">בחלוקה</span> <span class="regular">השרירותית</span><span class="regular">־</span><span class="regular">התקנונית</span> <span class="regular">יוחדו</span> <span class="regular">לאימהות</span> <span class="regular">בקיבוץ</span> <span class="regular">תפקידים</span> <span class="regular">אחרים</span> <span class="regular">מאלה</span> <span class="regular">שניתנו</span> <span class="regular">לאבות</span> <span class="regular">ולכן</span> <span class="regular">יש</span> <span class="regular">מקום</span> <span class="regular">להקדיש</span> <span class="regular">להן</span> <span class="regular">מקום</span> <span class="regular">משלהן</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">כמו</span> <span class="regular">כן</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">מאחר</span> <span class="regular">שיצאתי</span> <span class="regular">לדרך</span> <span class="regular">בעקבות</span> <span class="regular">בקשה</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">חברותיי</span> <span class="regular">האימהות</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">בנות</span> <span class="regular">תרבויות</span> <span class="regular">שונות</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">החלטתי</span> <span class="regular">להסתפק</span> <span class="regular">בשיחות</span> <span class="regular">עם</span> <span class="regular">אימהות</span> <span class="regular">בלבד</span> <span class="regular">ולהביא</span> <span class="regular">לחברותיי</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">קולותיהן</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">האימהות</span> <span class="regular">שסיקרנו</span> <span class="regular">אותן</span> <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">כך</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl" style="text-indent:0;"><span class="regular"> </span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl" style="text-indent:0;"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regularbold">"</span><span class="regularbold">שומרת</span> <span class="regularbold">לילה</span> <span class="regularbold">בואי</span> <span class="regularbold">לאוריין</span> <span class="regularbold">בגן</span> <span class="regularbold">פשוש</span><span class="regularbold">"</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl" style="text-indent:0;"><span class="regular"> </span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl" style="text-indent:0;"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">אף</span> <span class="regular">פעם</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">ישבתי</span> <span class="regular">עם</span> <span class="regular">אמא</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span> <span class="regular">לשיחה</span> <span class="regular">עמוקה</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">חוויותיה</span> <span class="regular">כאם</span> <span class="regular">בחינוך</span> <span class="regular">המשותף</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">גם</span> <span class="regular">היא</span> <span class="regular">גדלה</span> <span class="regular">כך</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">בדיוק</span> <span class="regular">כמוני</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">באותו</span> <span class="regular">הקיבוץ</span><span class="regular">,</span>  <span class="regular">שנים</span> <span class="regular">לפניי</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">סבתא</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">שהגיעה</span> <span class="regular">לקיבוץ</span> <span class="regular">לבדה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">כנערה</span> <span class="regular">בת</span> <span class="regular">חמש</span><span class="regular">־</span><span class="regular">עשרה</span> <span class="regular">שעזבה</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">בית</span> <span class="regular">הוריה</span> <span class="regular">בגרמניה</span> <span class="regular">ועלתה</span> <span class="regular">לארץ עם עליית הנוער</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">השכלתי</span> <span class="regular">לשאול</span> <span class="regular">ואולי</span> <span class="regular">גם</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">הייתה</span> <span class="regular">משתפת</span> <span class="regular">ממילא</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">החיים</span> <span class="regular">היו</span> <span class="regular">קשים</span> <span class="regular">אתה</span> <span class="regular">בהרבה</span> <span class="regular">מובנים</span> <span class="regular">והיא</span> <span class="regular">מיעטה</span> <span class="regular">לדבר</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">הרבתה</span> <span class="regular">לעשות</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">ועכשיו</span> <span class="regular">כבר</span> <span class="regular">מאוחר</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">מה</span> <span class="regular">שאני</span> <span class="regular">יודעת</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">האימהות</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">אחת</span> <span class="regular">מהן</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">כפי</span> <span class="regular">שחוותה</span> <span class="regular">אותה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">הוא</span> <span class="regular">תוצר</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">שברי</span> <span class="regular">משפטים</span> <span class="regular">וסיפורים</span> <span class="regular">קצרים</span> <span class="regular">שנאמרו</span> <span class="regular">בהזדמנויות</span> <span class="regular">שונות</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">קרום</span> <span class="regular">דק</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">הווה</span> <span class="regular">חם</span> <span class="regular">ומכבד</span> <span class="regular">נמתח</span> <span class="regular">מעל</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">כמו</span> <span class="regular">הסכם</span> <span class="regular">שבשתיקה</span><span class="regular">:</span> <span class="regular">אנחנו</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">חוזרות</span> <span class="regular">לאחור</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">אבל</span> <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">אחת</span> <span class="regular">מהן</span> <span class="regular">בתורה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">לתפיסתי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">יצקה</span> <span class="regular">ביחסים</span> <span class="regular">עם</span> <span class="regular">נכדיה</span> <span class="regular">גם</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">האמא</span> <span class="regular">שרצתה</span> <span class="regular">להיות</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">תמיד</span> <span class="regular">אפשר</span> <span class="regular">לתקן</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">הבית</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">סבא</span> <span class="regular">וסבתא</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span> <span class="regular">היה</span> <span class="regular">לי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">לאחיי</span> <span class="regular">ולבני</span> <span class="regular">דודיי</span> <span class="regular">כמו</span> <span class="regular">אי</span> <span class="regular">הילדים</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">בכל</span> <span class="regular">שעה</span> <span class="regular">משעות</span> <span class="regular">היממה</span> <span class="regular">יכולנו</span> <span class="regular">לפתוח</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">הדלת</span> <span class="regular">ולקבל</span> <span class="regular">בו</span> <span class="regular">מקלט</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">אני</span> <span class="regular">זוכרת</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">סבתא</span> <span class="regular">בחלוק</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ידיה</span> <span class="regular">חלקות</span> <span class="regular">וחמות</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">שולחן</span> <span class="regular">האוכל</span> <span class="regular">חיכתה</span> <span class="regular">עוגת</span> <span class="regular">הקוקוס</span> <span class="regular">שלה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">אחת</span> <span class="regular">התחלפה</span> <span class="regular">באחרת</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">תמיד</span> <span class="regular">מוכנה</span> <span class="regular">עבורנו</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">הבית</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">אמא</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span> <span class="regular">מתפקד</span> <span class="regular">כך</span> <span class="regular">בדיוק</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">עבור</span> <span class="regular">ילדינו</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">אני</span> <span class="regular">דומה</span> <span class="regular">לשתיהן</span> <span class="regular">בהרבה</span> <span class="regular">מובנים</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">מרגישה</span> <span class="regular">חלק</span> <span class="regular">משושלת</span> <span class="regular">נשים</span> <span class="regular">שמשהו</span> <span class="regular">חזק</span> <span class="regular">עבר</span> <span class="regular">בה</span> <span class="regular">בלי</span> <span class="regular">מילים</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">גם</span> <span class="regular">בלי</span> <span class="regular">לגדול</span> <span class="regular">באותו</span> <span class="regular">הבית</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">איזו</span> <span class="regular">ברית</span> <span class="regular">חזקה</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">קשר</span> <span class="regular">שהוא</span> <span class="regular">כנראה</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">רק</span> <span class="regular">גנטי</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">כשהתחלתי</span> <span class="regular">לראיין</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">האימהות</span> <span class="regular">לספר</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">עלה</span> <span class="regular">בדעתי</span> <span class="regular">לראיין</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">אמא</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">נתתי</span> <span class="regular">דעתי</span> <span class="regular">מדוע</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">עם</span> <span class="regular">הזמן</span> <span class="regular">נוכחתי</span> <span class="regular">שקל</span> <span class="regular">לי</span> <span class="regular">לשמוע</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">נבכי</span> <span class="regular">אימהותן</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">נשים</span> <span class="regular">זרות</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">אבל</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">אצליח</span> <span class="regular">לעשות</span> <span class="regular">זאת</span> <span class="regular">עם</span> <span class="regular">אמא</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">אחת</span> <span class="regular">מהן</span> <span class="regular">נתנה</span> <span class="regular">בקולה</span> <span class="regular">תשובות</span> <span class="regular">שיכולתי</span> <span class="regular">לדמיין</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">אמא</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span> <span class="regular">עונה</span> <span class="regular">במקומן</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">באמצעותן</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">כך</span> <span class="regular">נדמה</span> <span class="regular">לי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">הרכבתי</span> <span class="regular">תמונה</span> <span class="regular">מספקת</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">כשאני</span> <span class="regular">מבקרת</span> <span class="regular">היום</span> <span class="regular">בקיבוץ</span> <span class="regular">ילדותי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">הולכת</span> <span class="regular">עם</span> <span class="regular">בתי</span> <span class="regular">באותם</span> <span class="regular">השבילים</span> <span class="regular">שהיא</span> <span class="regular">דור</span> <span class="regular">רביעי</span> <span class="regular">לצעוד</span> <span class="regular">עליהם</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">לראשונה</span> <span class="regular">אני</span> <span class="regular">הופכת</span> <span class="regular">כיוון</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">אני</span> <span class="regular">כבר</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">הולכת</span> <span class="regular">בהם</span> <span class="regular">בזכרוני</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">מבית</span> <span class="regular">הילדים</span> <span class="regular">אל</span> <span class="regular">חדר</span> <span class="regular">ההורים</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">מראש</span> <span class="regular">הגבעה</span> <span class="regular">אל</span> <span class="regular">שיפוליה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">אלא</span> <span class="regular">מנסה</span> <span class="regular">לדמיין</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">אמא</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span> <span class="regular">צועדת</span> <span class="regular">במעלה</span> <span class="regular">השביל</span> <span class="regular">אל</span> <span class="regular">בית</span> <span class="regular">התינוקות</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">אם</span> <span class="regular">צעירה</span> <span class="regular">לבת</span> <span class="regular">בכורה</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">מה</span> <span class="regular">הרגישה</span> <span class="regular">בדרכה</span><span class="regular">?</span> <span class="regular">האם</span> <span class="regular">הלכה</span> <span class="regular">בצעדים</span> <span class="regular">בוטחים</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">האם</span> <span class="regular">השאירה</span> <span class="regular">אותי</span> <span class="regular">שם</span> <span class="regular">בלב</span> <span class="regular">שלם</span><span class="regular">?</span> <span class="regular">מה</span> <span class="regular">חשבה</span> <span class="regular">בלילות</span> <span class="regular">סערה</span><span class="regular">?</span> <span class="regular">בימי</span> <span class="regular">מחלה</span> <span class="regular">או</span> <span class="regular">מלחמה</span><span class="regular">?</span> <span class="regular">האם</span> <span class="regular">נכנעה</span> <span class="regular">לתכתיב</span> <span class="regular">חברתי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">או</span> <span class="regular">שמא</span> <span class="regular">בחרה</span> <span class="regular">בצורת</span> <span class="regular">האימהות</span> <span class="regular">שהתאימה</span> <span class="regular">לה</span><span class="regular">?</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">אני</span> <span class="regular">אדוקה</span> <span class="regular">בהחלטתי</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">לפתוח</span> <span class="regular">עם</span> <span class="regular">אמא</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">השאלות</span> <span class="regular">האלה</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">היא</span> <span class="regular">מודעת</span> <span class="regular">לכך</span> <span class="regular">שאני</span> <span class="regular">מראיינת</span> <span class="regular">אימהות</span> <span class="regular">אחרות</span> <span class="regular">ומשתיקתה</span> <span class="regular">אני</span> <span class="regular">מבינה</span> <span class="regular">שלא</span> <span class="regular">קל</span> <span class="regular">לה</span> <span class="regular">החיטוט</span> <span class="regular">בכך</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">אני</span> <span class="regular">חשה</span> <span class="regular">שיש</span> <span class="regular">בה</span> <span class="regular">תחושת</span> <span class="regular">החמצה</span> <span class="regular">אבל</span> <span class="regular">אין</span> <span class="regular">בי</span> <span class="regular">חובה</span> <span class="regular">לשמוע</span> <span class="regular">אותה</span> <span class="regular">אומרת</span> <span class="regular">זאת</span> <span class="regular">במפורש</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">אין</span> <span class="regular">צורך</span> <span class="regular">להכאיב</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">הניסיון</span> <span class="regular">להבין</span> <span class="regular">אותה</span> <span class="regular">ולדמיין</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">"</span><span class="regular">תפקידה</span> <span class="regular">במחזה</span><span class="regular">",</span> <span class="regular">די</span> <span class="regular">בו</span> <span class="regular">עבורי</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">הוא</span> <span class="regular">מאפשר</span> <span class="regular">לי</span> <span class="regular">לשמוח</span> <span class="regular">באמא</span> <span class="regular">שאני</span> <span class="regular">ולהבין</span> <span class="regular">עכשיו</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">שנים</span> <span class="regular">אל</span> <span class="regular">תוך</span> <span class="regular">האימהות</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ממה</span> <span class="regular">נובע</span> <span class="regular">הצורך</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span> <span class="regular">לשמור</span> <span class="regular">קרוב</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">ילדיי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">שלא</span> <span class="regular">יצטרכו</span> <span class="regular">לעבור</span> <span class="regular">דרך</span> <span class="regular">ארוכה</span> <span class="regular">אליי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">אל</span> <span class="regular">אבא</span> <span class="regular">שלהם</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">ללא</span> <span class="regular">מודל</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">ילדות</span> <span class="regular">בבית</span> <span class="regular">ההורים</span><span class="regular">, "</span><span class="regular">בראתי</span><span class="regular">"</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">האימהות</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span> <span class="regular">מתוך</span> <span class="regular">איזה</span> <span class="regular">אידיאל</span> <span class="regular">שבניתי</span> <span class="regular">לעצמי</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">לכן</span> <span class="regular">בחרתי</span> <span class="regular">ללקט</span> <span class="regular">תשובות</span> <span class="regular">מאימהות</span> <span class="regular">זרות</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ואילו</span> <span class="regular">ביני</span> <span class="regular">ובין</span> <span class="regular">אמא</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">בינה</span> <span class="regular">ובין</span> <span class="regular">אמה</span> <span class="regular">המתה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">יישארו</span> <span class="regular">הדממה</span> <span class="regular">והבחירה</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">אחת</span> <span class="regular">מאתנו</span> <span class="regular">לספר</span> <span class="regular">לעצמה</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">הסיפור</span> <span class="regular">שהכי</span> <span class="regular">קל</span> <span class="regular">לה</span> <span class="regular">לחיות</span> <span class="regular">בתוכו</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">"</span><span class="regular">שומרת</span> <span class="regular">לילה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">בואי</span> <span class="regular">לאוריין</span> <span class="regular">בגן</span> <span class="regular">פשוש</span><span class="regular">",</span> <span class="regular">כך</span> <span class="regular">למדתי</span> <span class="regular">מגיל</span> <span class="regular">רך</span> <span class="regular">לקרוא</span> <span class="regular">אל</span> <span class="regular">החושך</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ומהחושך</span> <span class="regular">הייתה</span> <span class="regular">מגיחה</span> <span class="regular">אז</span> <span class="regular">אמא</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">מישהו</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">אף</span> <span class="regular">פעם</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">ידעתי</span> <span class="regular">מי</span> <span class="regular">תבוא</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">מי</span> <span class="regular">תהיה</span> <span class="regular">שומרת</span> <span class="regular">הלילה</span> <span class="regular">התורנית</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">הובטח</span> <span class="regular">לנו</span> <span class="regular">תמיד</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">שהשומרת</span> <span class="regular">-</span> <span class="regular">שומרת</span><span class="regular">. "</span><span class="regular">היא</span> <span class="regular">גם</span> <span class="regular">אמא</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">מישהו</span><span class="regular">",</span> <span class="regular">היא</span> <span class="regular">תדע</span> <span class="regular">לתת</span> <span class="regular">מענה</span> <span class="regular">לפחדים</span> <span class="regular">או</span> <span class="regular">מכאובים</span> <span class="regular">וישנו</span> <span class="regular">גם</span> <span class="regular">שומר</span> <span class="regular">הלילה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">שמסייר</span> <span class="regular">חמוש</span> <span class="regular">בין</span> <span class="regular">השבילים</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">אנחנו</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">הילדים</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">אמורים</span> <span class="regular">לחוש</span> <span class="regular">שמורים</span> <span class="regular">ובטוחים</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">באפריל</span> <span class="regular">1980</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">כשהייתי</span> <span class="regular">כבת</span> <span class="regular">שמונה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">פרצה</span> <span class="regular">חוליית</span> <span class="regular">מחבלים</span> <span class="regular">לבית</span> <span class="regular">התינוקות</span> <span class="regular">בקיבוץ</span> <span class="regular">משגב</span> <span class="regular">עם</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">לאחר</span> <span class="regular">לילה</span> <span class="regular">מורט</span> <span class="regular">עצבים</span> <span class="regular">הסתיים</span> <span class="regular">האירוע</span> <span class="regular">הנורא</span> <span class="regular">עם</span> <span class="regular">תינוק</span> <span class="regular">הרוג</span> <span class="regular">במיטתו</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">מזכיר</span> <span class="regular">הקיבוץ</span> <span class="regular">שנרצח</span> <span class="regular">בתוך</span> <span class="regular">בית</span> <span class="regular">התינוקות</span> <span class="regular">וחייל</span> <span class="regular">סיירת</span> <span class="regular">גולני</span> <span class="regular">שנהרג</span> <span class="regular">בנסיון</span> <span class="regular">הפריצה</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">סיפור</span> <span class="regular">המקרה</span> <span class="regular">טלטל</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">הארץ</span> <span class="regular">כולה</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">בשבילי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">כילדה</span> <span class="regular">שישנה</span> <span class="regular">בבית</span> <span class="regular">הילדים</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">זה</span> <span class="regular">היה</span> <span class="regular">אישור</span> <span class="regular">לכל</span> <span class="regular">הפחדים</span><span class="regular">:</span> <span class="regular">אף</span> <span class="regular">אחד</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">יכול</span> <span class="regular">לשמור</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">בית</span> <span class="regular">הילדים</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">אף</span> <span class="regular">אחד</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">יכול</span> <span class="regular">לשמור</span> <span class="regular">עליי</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">המון</span> <span class="regular">מחשבות</span> <span class="regular">היו</span> <span class="regular">לי</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">הילדים</span> <span class="regular">ההם</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">שעברו</span> <span class="regular">ליל</span> <span class="regular">אימה</span> <span class="regular">הרחק</span> <span class="regular">מהוריהם</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">כשהתחלתי</span> <span class="regular">לעסוק</span> <span class="regular">בנושא</span> <span class="regular">האימהות</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">רציתי</span> <span class="regular">לשמוע</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">אימהות</span> <span class="regular">הלילה</span> <span class="regular">ההוא</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">להקשיב</span> <span class="regular">לאימה</span> <span class="regular">מצדו</span> <span class="regular">האחר</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">הסיוט</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">לשמוע</span> <span class="regular">מה</span> <span class="regular">עבר</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">אם</span> <span class="regular">שבמשך</span> <span class="regular">לילה</span> <span class="regular">שלם</span> <span class="regular">ילדה</span> <span class="regular">הפעוט</span> <span class="regular">מוחזק</span> <span class="regular">בידי</span> <span class="regular">חוליית</span> <span class="regular">מחבלים</span> <span class="regular">חמושה</span> <span class="regular">והיא</span> <span class="regular">אינה</span> <span class="regular">לצדו</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">חשבתי</span> <span class="regular">שאין</span> <span class="regular">רגע</span> <span class="regular">קיצוני</span> <span class="regular">מזה</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">בחיפושיי</span> <span class="regular">מצאתי</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">נורית</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">שבתה</span> <span class="regular">הקטנה</span> <span class="regular">הייתה</span> <span class="regular">חטופה</span> <span class="regular">באותו</span> <span class="regular">לילה</span> <span class="regular">מבעית</span> <span class="regular">בבית</span> <span class="regular">התינוקות</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">עשר</span> <span class="regular">שעות</span> <span class="regular">שבהן</span> <span class="regular">התממש</span> <span class="regular">"</span><span class="regular">אם</span> <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">הפחדים</span> <span class="regular">ההוריים</span><span class="regular">",</span> <span class="regular">והקשבתי</span> <span class="regular">לה</span> <span class="regular">כאם</span> <span class="regular">לילדים</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">עוד</span> <span class="regular">מתוך</span> <span class="regular">פחדיה</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">הילדה</span> <span class="regular">בת</span> <span class="regular">השמונה</span> <span class="regular">שהייתי</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">האם</span> <span class="regular">חשבו</span> <span class="regular">עד</span> <span class="regular">אז</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">תרחיש</span> <span class="regular">קיצוני</span> <span class="regular">שכזה</span><span class="regular">?</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">ממה</span> <span class="regular">פחדו</span> <span class="regular">אימהות</span> <span class="regular">בית</span> <span class="regular">הילדים</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">והאם</span> <span class="regular">העזו</span> <span class="regular">לבטא</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">פחדיהן</span><span class="regular">?</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl" style="text-indent:0;"><span class="regular"> </span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl" style="text-indent:0;"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">עכשיו</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">כשנמסתי</span> <span class="regular">לתוך</span> <span class="regular">השיחות</span> <span class="regular">והראיונות</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">נזכרתי</span> <span class="regular">במחברת</span> <span class="regular">הכתובה</span> <span class="regular">שהייתה</span> <span class="regular">מונחת</span> <span class="regular">בכל</span> <span class="regular">בית</span> <span class="regular">ילדים</span> <span class="regular">בקיבוץ</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span><span class="regular">:</span> <span class="regularbold">מחברת</span> <span class="regularbold">שומרת</span> <span class="regularbold">הלילה</span><span class="regularbold">.</span> <span class="regular">בתוכה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">דפי</span> <span class="regular">שורות</span> <span class="regular">עדינים</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">כתבו</span> <span class="regular">האימהות</span> <span class="regular">למטפלות</span> <span class="regular">והמטפלות</span> <span class="regular">לשומרות</span> <span class="regular">הלילה</span> <span class="regular">-</span> <span class="regular">והן</span> <span class="regular">השיבו</span> <span class="regular">להן</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">תיארו</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">קורות</span> <span class="regular">הלילה</span><span class="regular">:</span> <span class="regular">כתבי</span> <span class="regular">יד</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">אימהות</span> <span class="regular">מתחלפות</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">אחת</span> <span class="regular">בתורה</span> <span class="regular">הייתה</span> <span class="regular">כותבת</span> <span class="regular">דו</span><span class="regular">"</span><span class="regular">ח</span> <span class="regular">קצר</span> <span class="regular">או</span> <span class="regular">בקשות</span> <span class="regular">והנחיות</span> <span class="regular">לגבי</span> <span class="regular">ילדי</span> <span class="regular">בית</span> <span class="regular">הילדים</span><span class="regular">:</span> <span class="regular">אם</span> <span class="regular">ילד</span> <span class="regular">חולה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">מתי</span> <span class="regular">קיבל</span> <span class="regular">תרופה</span> <span class="regular">להורדת</span> <span class="regular">החום</span> <span class="regular">ומה</span> <span class="regular">לעשות</span> <span class="regular">אם</span> <span class="regular">יתעורר</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">למי</span> <span class="regular">יש</span> <span class="regular">פחדים</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">מי</span> <span class="regular">סובל</span> <span class="regular">מהרטבות</span> <span class="regular">לילה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">מי</span> <span class="regular">רוצה</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">אמא</span> <span class="regular">ומה</span> <span class="regular">עושים</span><span class="regular">...</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">רציתי</span> <span class="regular">לחפש</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">מחברות</span> <span class="regular">שומרת</span> <span class="regular">הלילה</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">קבוצת</span> <span class="regular">"</span><span class="regular">פשוש</span><span class="regular">",</span> <span class="regular">קבוצת</span> <span class="regular">הילדים</span> <span class="regular">שבה</span> <span class="regular">גדלתי</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">חשבתי</span> <span class="regular">שאוכל</span> <span class="regular">למצוא</span> <span class="regular">בתוכן</span> <span class="regular">איזו</span> <span class="regular">ילדה</span> <span class="regular">הייתי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">מה</span> <span class="regular">כתבה</span> <span class="regular">אמא</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">מה</span> <span class="regular">ביקשה</span> <span class="regular">עבורי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">מה</span> <span class="regular">היה</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">לאכזבתי</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">המחברות</span> <span class="regular">הללו</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">נשתמרו</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">בשנות</span> <span class="regular">השבעים</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">המאה</span> <span class="regular">העשרים</span> <span class="regular">איש</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">חשב</span> <span class="regular">שיום</span> <span class="regular">אחד</span> <span class="regular">יהיה</span> <span class="regular">להן</span> <span class="regular">ערך</span> <span class="regular">היסטורי</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">קיבוצים</span> <span class="regular">מעטים</span> <span class="regular">שמרו</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">המחברות</span> <span class="regular">וכשמצאתי</span> <span class="regular">אותן</span> <span class="regular">בארכיון</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">אחד</span> <span class="regular">מקיבוצי</span> <span class="regular">עמק</span> <span class="regular">הירדן</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ישבתי</span> <span class="regular">שעות</span> <span class="regular">ארוכות</span> <span class="regular">וצללתי</span> <span class="regular">עמוק</span> <span class="regular">לתוכן</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">בחרתי</span> <span class="regular">לשלב</span> <span class="regular">בספר</span> <span class="regular">זה</span> <span class="regular">עמודים</span> <span class="regular">מתוך</span> <span class="regular">אחת</span> <span class="regular">המחברות</span> <span class="regular">משנות</span> <span class="regular">השבעים</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">תוך</span> <span class="regular">שינוי</span> <span class="regular">שמות</span> <span class="regular">הילדים</span> <span class="regular">כדי</span> <span class="regular">לא</span> <span class="regular">לפגוע</span> <span class="regular">בפרטיותם</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">לכאורה</span> <span class="regular">כתובים</span> <span class="regular">בהן</span> <span class="regular">מסרים</span> <span class="regular">עניינים</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">אך</span> <span class="regular">בקריאה</span> <span class="regular">מעמיקה</span> <span class="regular">יותר</span> <span class="regular">מצאתי</span> <span class="regular">תשובה</span> <span class="regular">לשאלה</span> <span class="regular">מרכזית</span> <span class="regular">שעלתה</span> <span class="regular">בי</span> <span class="regular">בראשית</span> <span class="regular">העיסוק</span> <span class="regular">בחומרים</span><span class="regular">:</span> <span class="regular">האם</span> <span class="regular">היה</span> <span class="regular">דפוס</span> <span class="regular">אימהי</span> <span class="regular">משותף</span> <span class="regular">לנשות</span> <span class="regular">הלינה</span> <span class="regular">המשותפת</span><span class="regular">?</span></span></p>
         
         <p dir="rtl"><span class="הפקת מהדורה אלקטרונית על ידי מנדלי מוכר-ספרים ברשת"></span><span class="regular">
               <span class="regular">מצאתי</span> <span class="regular">כי</span> <span class="regular">בתוך</span> <span class="regular">אותה</span> <span class="regular">תפיסת</span> <span class="regular">עולם</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">תחת</span> <span class="regular">אותם</span> <span class="regular">ציווים</span> <span class="regular">חברתיים</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">ביטאה</span> <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">אחת</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">עצמה</span><span class="regular">:</span> <span class="regular">תמצית</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">אימהות</span> <span class="regular">פרוטוקולית</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">די</span> <span class="regular">בבחירת</span> <span class="regular">המילים</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">באופיו</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">הדיווח</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">כדי</span> <span class="regular">לזהות</span> <span class="regular">עולם</span> <span class="regular">ריגשי</span> <span class="regular">שלם</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">בחרתי</span> <span class="regular">להביא</span> <span class="regular">דוגמאות</span> <span class="regular">מתוך</span> <span class="regular">אותן</span> <span class="regular">מחברות</span><span class="regular">:</span> <span class="regular">כתבי</span> <span class="regular">יד</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">אימהות</span> <span class="regular">מתחלפות</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">כל</span> <span class="regular">אחת</span> <span class="regular">מהן</span> <span class="regular">פעם</span> <span class="regular">אמא</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">פעם</span> <span class="regular">מטפלת</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">פעם</span> <span class="regular">שומרת</span> <span class="regular">הלילה</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">המרואיינות</span> <span class="regular">שלי</span> <span class="regular">מדברות</span> <span class="regular">על</span> <span class="regular">אימהותן</span> <span class="regular">שהייתה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">אבל</span> <span class="regular">השורות</span> <span class="regular">הכתובות</span> <span class="regular">במחברת</span> <span class="regular">מביאות</span> <span class="regular">את</span> <span class="regular">הדבר</span> <span class="regular">עצמו</span> <span class="regular">כפי</span> <span class="regular">שהיה</span> <span class="regular">בזמן</span> <span class="regular">אמת</span><span class="regular">.</span> <span class="regular">המונולוגים</span> <span class="regular">הנאמרים</span> <span class="regular">היום</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">לצד</span> <span class="regular">ההתכתבויות</span> <span class="regular">מן</span> <span class="regular">העבר</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">משלימים</span> <span class="regular">תמונה</span> <span class="regular">מרתקת</span> <span class="regular">של</span> <span class="regular">אימהות</span> <span class="regular">יוצאת</span> <span class="regular">דופן</span> <span class="regular">שהיה</span> <span class="regular">בה</span> <span class="regular">הרבה</span><span class="regular">,</span> <span class="regular">וכל</span> <span class="regular">כך</span> <span class="regular">מעט</span><span class="regular">.</span></span></p>
         
      </div>
ספר מודפס
מחיר מוצר 43.20 ₪ מחיר רגיל 64.80 ₪ מחיר מדף 0.00 ₪
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מחיר מוצר 38.00 ₪ מחיר מדף 0.00 ₪
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